Monday, March 8, 2010

worthy

there is a part of me that wonders about whether i am worthy of love. i wonder if i am worthy of belonging. i wonder if i am worthy of being an example. i wonder if i am worthy of God's promises. before any of you, my friends start to worry. i'm okay. i just don't know my worth right now. i want to believe that i am worth God's grace. i want to believe that i am worth the love that other's have for me. i want to believe that i can be an example for someone. i'm just not convinced.

i work really hard and keeping myself grounded. i try to keep myself focused on the plan that God has for me. i try to live His plan. i try to remember the promise that He has made to all of us. however, even when i try, i can't seem to find myself in it all. i struggle to make sence of what i am supposed to be doing.

i hear so often people tell me to listen to Him. quite frankly, i can't always hear Him. i think there are more times when He is calling and i don't hear than times when i do hear. i want to believe that i am living the life He gave me but i'm just not quite sure.

so for now, i will continue to wonder if i am really worthy of it all. thank you to my friends and family for including me, even when i don't feel worthy.

1 comment:

Karsyn524 said...

Carolina you are so worthy! I totally understand what you mean though. I feel like this often. I want to live my life the right way but there are times when it is a struggle and I fall. I know that He is with me. I try not to question that but yes at times it is hard to hear him. I think most the time it is hard for us to hear because we are talking so loud that all we hear are our own voices!

but rest assured you are very worthy of all that is great. And you are doing a great job everyday! I am inspired by you often!